Family Stories

The Lawson family has a reunion each year about this time. Some years it’s really well attended and other years it’s mediocre. This year we celebrated Aunt Margie’s 80^th birthday so the clan was out in force. Boy there were a lot of people there that I didn't know – and I was related to a number of them.

One thing that I do love about reunions is the chance to catch up with those that you DO know and that you haven't seen in awhile. This year, for whatever reason, we cousins were particularly interested in talking about a few family stories that had been floating around about how our parents left their childhood home.

We all know that our parents had a collectively rough childhood, but it was really confirmed this weekend. In short, I learned that all three of the younger girls (Ann, Tootie and Millie) ran way and that two of my uncles were kicked out of the house.

Millie was the first to go. Her future husband, Joe, picked her up at the end of the driveway and took her north to Duluth to live with her older sister, Louise. Next, I believe, both Otto and Johnnie were kicked out of the house. My mom (Ann) can't remember why they were kicked out or where they went right away, but eventually Otto went into the service and Johnnie married Margie.

Then came the little girls. I've known for a number of years that my mom and her sister ran away from home, but it’s still rather disconcerting to think about the circumstances around this action. For instance, my Aunt Tootie could have left my mom but she chose to stay until Mom graduated from high school. Then they were both picked up at the end of the driveway by Aunt Millie.

My mom was a little confused as to why I would want to know these stories and why they should be shared with others. Easy, these stories show me many things – family loyalty, sibling love and respect for education. Of note though, if you know my mom, don’t mention this blog to her. J

So next time you have the opportunity to hear some family stories, take a moment to think about what you’re really hearing. What do your family stories tell you about your loved ones and your heritage? 

Family Love Stories

My mother's family. Ann, my mom, is the little one in the front. My uncle, Bud Lawson, is the strapping young man at the top right. Grandma Lillian stands in the center in the flowered dress with her husband, Harvey Lawson (in the hat), and is surrounded by their children - his, hers and theirs - along with Great Grandpa and Grandma Metzdorf (sitting).

We all have stories that are passed on from generation to generation. In my family, we have three love stories that are the backbone and the soul of our history. I think that whether they are love stories or otherwise, family history and the act of passing it on brings identity to the family.

Uncle Bud and Aunt Becky

My grandmother, Lillian Metzdorf Ackley Lawson Johnson, was a special woman. She was the oldest of six children and outlived four husband/men throughout the course of her life. My grandmother’s second husband, Harvey Lawson, was my mom’s father. When they married, they both had two children from previous marriages and all four were in their early teens. They were Louise and Bud Lawson, twins from my grandpa Harvey’s first marriage and Paul and Earl Ackley, brothers from Grandma Lillian’s first walk down the aisle.

As it turns out, Grandma Lillian’s stepson, Bud, was about the same age as her little sister, Becky. As the two grew up together, they grew close and eventually fell in love. As family lore has it, they were set to be married until one of my mom’s sisters said, “Wait, so that will make my aunt my sister and my brother my uncle.”

Unfortunately this was in earshot of my great-grandma who did all she could to squelch the young romance. It was wartime and Bud went overseas but continued to write Becky during his travels. The letters never got to her though as my great-grandmother intervened.

Both went on with their lives, believing that the other had given up on the relationship. Bud married and had a wonderful life with his wife, Sharlene, and their four children. Becky didn't marry but yet traveled extensively and cared for an uncle in the family.

As life moved forward, Sharlene was struck with diabetes which slowly took her life. It was very sad for our family and one of the first deaths I remember as a young teen. Sometime after Sharlene’s death, it was learned that Bud and Becky were in communication again. This is back before the age of Facebook and texts so this took a little bit of effort.

Soon this couple was married after waiting three-plus decades to be together. Talk about a love story! The couple shared but a short time together as my Great Aunt Becky was ill with a liver disease but I know they were happy, joyous months.

Mom and Dad

You could say that my mom (Ann) and dad (Melvin) met via the 1950’s version of Match.com as they were set up by a mutual friend. My mom’s sister-in-law, Darlene, grew up just down the road from my dad and mentioned him to my mom. The catch? Dad was in Greenland working construction so my mom had to write him a letter.

Again, as family lore goes, my dad received the letter in October of 1958 and heavily scrutinized the letter. Since there were no spelling errors in the document, he chose to write back. They met face-to-face in December, 1958, were engaged on Valentine’s Day, 1959 and were married by that June.

Was it a whirlwind romance? Without a doubt! Were they true companions throughout the almost five decades that they were together? Absolutely. And you can bet that I've been very cautious about spelling since, in a sense, my life depended on it.

Grandma Lillian and Grandpa Oscar

As my mother and father wed, two families were blended. Shortly after the marriage, however, tragedy struck and my dad’s mother, Marie, died of cancer. My mother’s father had died when she was three and Grandma Lillian had a relationship with a terrible man that I know only as “Jim.” Eventually Jim disappeared from the picture and a romance blossomed between Grandma Lillian and my paternal grandfather, Oscar. Yes, it’s true, my mom’s mom, married my dad’s dad. How’s that for a strange family tree?

And while Grandpa Oscar died when I was just a year old and the couple was together but for a few years, both sides of the family spoke fondly of the relationship. It was obvious that they both turned to one another in times of need to find someone that understood the hell they had suffered and could support each other.

It makes me wonder, as I think about these love stories, how my story will unfold. I met my husband via Match.com. A little different than my ancestors.